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Tuesday, 11 December 2012

Part Of My journal #4

Hey! How's it going?!

*angry mobs come running towards me with pitch forks and fire*

Me : I'm sorry, I'm sorry!! I've been busy lately! Don't kill me! (while running away)

~~~~~~~

TUESDAY 11 DECEMBER 2012

Yes, I have been the WORST blogger in history! I know I haven't blogged about anything at all for a few months now... So, from now on, I'm just going to share mostly of my journal...

I'm not going to be able to post my short stories because I actually lost them. Yes, all of them. And I didn't even have a copy of the work! I sulked the whole day knowing I just lost my work and I will never get it back.

 I will try my best to re-write it... I'll make sure I finish it and immediately post it.

You probably would have never known this but I've finished my first semester and now I'm in my second semester. I finished my first semester on October. I just started my second semester and yeah, no assignments yet... YET!!

So far, I've met five of my lecturers and one of them is the same lecturer I had last semester. Oh, and for my One Act Drama course, we're going to do a One Act Play.. This is so exciting!! And I actually have people I've never group with!!

The group leader told me that I will be one of the characters in the play -which means I will need to act-. Yay! I'm going to do something I've never done before again! Oh, and since I've started dancing, I've been addicted to it.

I started searching for dance tutorial and stuff like that... I'm currently learning Gee by SNSD. I already got half the dance move... I'm having so much fun doing so...

I just recently got myself a Skype too... If you want it, just ask for it. I'm rooming with seven other people.

Is there anything else that I still have to let you know. Updates that you haven't heard about?? I passed my exam last semester.

You know what? It's easier if you ask me questions... I'll definitely answer all of it! So, just ask me anything you want..

So, All The Best and....

Roger and Out... :D

Oh, I'm addicted to K-pop now!! :P hehehe




Monday, 8 October 2012

Everyday

Assalamualaikum....

Hey, I just wrote a new poem.... Yeah, I know... Too fast ????
Anyway, hope you like it... Please comment... :D

~~~~~~

Everyday,
Is torture when I say,
'You are not for me',
While my heart ache for you to be.

Everyday,
Is painful with you away,
When all I want from you,
Is to be near me like you always do.

Every minute,
Reminds me about our limit,
How I can never express this correctly,
But I hope you understand me.

Every night,
I wonder where is my light,
Now I know it's not from your love,
But from up above.

I hope you can understand,
I can never accept your hand,
For there are boundaries between you and me,
Just like it always will be.

Please forget me,
For it will make things easy,
For me to forget,
My crush on you and what I can never get.
~~~~~~~~~
A/N : Heheheheeehe... Hope you like it.... :D
So, All The Best and. . . .  
Roger and Out. . . . :D

Tuesday, 2 October 2012

That Special Something (Working Title)


It's hard to say goodbye,
To someone you loved the most,
It's hard to accept your lost,
And now you're asking "Why?".

Life will hit us with a hard blow,
Life will remind us where we are,
Death is never too far,
Neither is the day after tomorrow.

Someday you'll understand,
That life isn't forever,
Neither is the time we've been together,
Someday all of it will end.

I'm not trying to say,
To forget all the good times,
Neither am I saying that it's a crime,
To fly away.

I wish someone could understand,
What I'm going through,
There has to be one similarity between me and you,
Even though we're from different lands.

This may sound stupid and all,
But I don't care,
Because I just want to play fair,
In this life where I was forced to crawl.

It may not be clear,
But someday you'll find it,
The day when you were still a kid,
Trying hard not to shed a tear.
~~~~~~~~~~
A/N : Last poem for today!!!!!! 
Okaaayyyy.... I'm gonna go and continue on my story.... :D
So, All The Best and. . . 
Roger and Out. . . :D

What Is Life?


I could never understand,
Why life is never fair,
But when I look back to who I am,
I can finally be more aware.

My life may not be great,
But that's the whole point of it,
To go through life without regret,
And to never change a bit.

When we start to complain about life,
We should really be careful,
And to always think twice,
Because there are others who are hurtful.

There are a lot of challenges waiting for us,
But we never know,
Who should we trust,
And who should we follow.

Life is never easy,
But no one said that it's going to be simple,
Life is always tricky,
So you must be careful who you resemble.
~~~~~~~~~
A/N : One more poem and I'm done for today. . . Gonna need to continue working on my story. . .  :D
So, All The Best and. . . 
Roger and Out. . . : D

To My Beloved Mother

I know you didn't give birth to me,
But you're the one who took care of me,
I know I've been so cruel to you,
But the truth is that I love you.

Why is everything that I do,
Is wrong to you,
Why is everything that you say,
Never come to me in a right way.

When I think of you,
I can't stop crying,
Our emotions are changing,
But I will never forget you.

How can I ever deny,
That you can make me fly,
How can I ever deny,
That you can make me touch the sky.

When I'm old enough to understand,
I might get a chance,
A chance to show you,
How much I love you.
~~~~~~~~
A/N : Believe it or not this poem was written on October 27 2011. . Yeah, I know the exact date because I always write the date. . The reason this poem never got uploaded here is because I lost this poem. .
Luckily I found it and I could tell how it disappeared. The poem was written on a piece of paper. I have so many papers, so it's easy for it to vanish. The surprising part is that I found this poem in my file -where I put all other valuable items. O_o
Anyways, let me know what you think of this poem and if I should give this to my mother. .
So, All The Best and. . . 
Roger and Out. . . :D

Dear Father, I Wonder. . .

Okaaaayyyy.... Here's the rest of my poems. . . :D

Dear Father, I Wonder


Dear father,
I have always wondered,
What it would be like,
If you were never right.

Dear father,
I have always wondered,
What it would be like,
If you were never by my side.

Would I be okay?
Would I find my way?
Would I be able to live on?
Knowing a part of my heart is gone.

Dear father,
I never want to wonder,
About the how's and what's,
Even though it's there in my heart.

Dear father,
I hope you're feeling better,
Because I know you're hurting inside,
Whenever I'm not there in time.

I want you to always be happy,
And know that I love you dearly,
I may not be there,
But I hope you know that I care.

Dear father,
I can only wonder,
What if I was wrong,
About how I'm not strong.

Dear father,
Please tell mother,
That I love her too,
Even though this poem is for you.

Monday, 1 October 2012

Be Myself

This is my last poem for today. . . I'll post the rest tomorrow. . :D


Why can't I be myself?
When I know I'm more than this,
Why is everybody else?
Deleting me from their list.

Am I nothing more than an outcast?
Am I just another freak show?
Why can't I stop living in my past?
And just try to let it go.

I wanna be more than what I show,
I wanna be more than this girl,
I wanna try to let this go,
And see what is real.

I'm a girl you will never understand,
I'm a girl that can be anything I wanna be,
I can sail the world and not pretend,
To be someone other than me.

I can show you a whole new world,
And not regret every second of your time,
I can give you all the words,
That can make the perfect rhyme.

I can show you the real me,
I can show you what I could do,
I can tell you what I wanna be,
I can tell you what is true.

Maybe one day I'll find my way,
For me to be myself,
Maybe one day I can break away,
Just like everybody else.
~~~~~~
A/N : Let me know what you think.. . . 
All The Best and. . . 
Roger and Out. . . :D

What Is Love?


Love is something I'll never understand,
Love is just another problem in my hand,
When will I open my eyes?
 To see that they are all just lies.

Love don't mean any harm,
Nor will it be troublesome,
But why can't I think that way?
Even though I get so much love everyday.

Love is a mystery that can never be unravel,
No matter how far you travel,
Love will remain a mystery,
In a way even I couldn't see.

As a matter of fact,
I don't know how to react,
If you ask me what love means,
Or ask me whether love is a prize to win.

Love is not something you can get easily,
Because none of us could see,
That to gain love, you have to earn it,
Not learn it.

Maybe one day I'll finally understand,
Why the people in the past ran,
Ran so fast just for love,
Even when they're up above.
~~~~~~
A/N : Hehe... Hope you like it and please tell me what you think. . . 
All The Best and. . . . 
Roger and Out. . .  :D

ABC Poem


Another lonely night,
But I'm still alright,
Can't stop to think about you,
Do you know how much I miss you?
Either way, I can't stay,
For there is too much in the way,
Go ahead and set yourself free,
Hey, you know you wanna be with me,
I will do all that I can,
Just to make you understand,
Kneeling down won't make a difference,
Like I will ever want to make some reference,
Might as well just give up the game,
Neither you nor I could keep our fame,
On my last day here,
Please break away all my fears,
Quite down a little bit,
Right at the moment when I kiss your lips,
Sing me the melody only you and I can make,
Tell me that our vow will never break,
Unite all of our feelings together,
Very close so it will last forever,
With all the things you could see apart,
X-rays can't let you see through one's heart,
You should know by now,
Zodiac can make you wonder 'How?'
~~~~~~
A/N : The letter 'Z' is really confusing for me. . I hope it's not that confusing... :D
So, All The Best and. .. 
Roger and Out. . . :D

EXAM WEEK!!!

Assalamualaikum and YES. . . It is that time of the year/semester when you will encounter 'The Examination'.

Somehow, I made it sound awesome! There is nothing awesome about this!
*sigh*
The end is nearing. I'm actually excited about it but at the same time, scared of it.

Who knows what could happen?
But hey, I only have three papers to take anyway.
SO, there's not much for me to worry about, right? Well, that's what I think.

Anyway, let's stop talking about the exam. I'm getting bored of it. Let's talk about a story I'm concentrating on currently.

'My Last Wishes'.

That's the title. As you can already know, I'm still working on it. So, if I cant finish it within this month, then I'll just enter this story for next years Watty Awards.

Yeah, I know. This is very disappointing.
I'm really sorry..

If I have the time, I'll write a short story for you to read. After this, I'll post more of my poems, to make up for my lack of. . .

Lack of what?
You tell me....
Anything is fine..

Tune in for my poems. . .

So, All The Best and. . ..

Roger and Out. .. :D

Tuesday, 18 September 2012

GO GLAM!!!

Assalamualaikum.....

Wow! This could be the first time I actually start my entry properly! Haha! Proper is the least of my worries..  But don't be surprise if one day you hear people saying how proper I am.. I mean, the way I eat, the way I sit, the way... To put it simply, the way I do almost everything!

What does this have anything to do with my title? Nothing! That's what... :)

Right, going back to what my title screams... GO GLAM!!!
That is the theme for this event where we will meet our mentor.. Which will start in a few hours.. So, why am I here writing (more like typing) this entry?

Because I have no idea what to wear! This could be the first time that I'm worried about what to wear.. I would usually just put on anything that is presentable? Or proper! Haha!

To top it all, I don't actually have anything glamorous to wear.. Pity me. But I'm not asking for your sympathy!! Now, I really don't know what to do.. 

Actually, I have an idea and it involves asking for my housemates help.. Hehe (evil laughs)... I'm sorry, I can't be evil.. It's just not me.. I can be evil only at proper times. 

Anyway, let's get my mind off of this whole GO GLAM thing... What to talk about??? Hmmm....
I know!

I'm currently working on a novel but it's not for publishing. I just want to enter it for an award on this writing website.. Wattpad!

I'm still working on it, unfortunately.. I'm starting to think that I might not be able to finish it on time before the dead line.. But I will try my best to finish it...

Once I've finished it, I will post it here so you can read it too... But, if you want to vote for my story on that award, then visit this website :


The link above will direct you to my profile there... Search for the story entitled 'My Last Wishes'... But only do so when I announced that I have finished writing it and starting to post the story.. 

But if you want to read my poetry -which is also submitted for the first ever Wattpad Attys- you can go there anytime. 

Hehe...

I guess that's all for now.. I need to find something to wear for this event.. *sigh*
Two and a half hour is enough, right?

I hope it is..
So, All The Best and....

Roger and Out... :D

Wassalam... hehehehe

Wednesday, 12 September 2012

For You

For You


There has never been a day,
Where I have never shed a tear,
Neither was there a way,
For me to escape this fear.

Losing you was something hard,
Knowing you won't be there,
When I need to feel your heart,
Close in my care.

If you were still here,
I would make up for lost time,
I would try to find a cure,
To heal all of your crime.

If you were still here,
I would make sure that you know,
How much I have to fear,
Just so you won't go.

I want to feel you near me,
I want to feel your kindness,
So that I could finally see,
How much I have always known less.

"Please don't go",
Is all that I could say,
For you to know,
I want you to stay.
~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N : This is my newest poem.... I wrote it on the 9th of September... Hope you like it and I am so sorry for not updating recently...
I've been way too busy lately with my final projects and presentation... What's worse is that my final exam is nearing.. So, I hope I can update more often after everything cools down a bit... 
So, All The Best and....
Roger and Out.. :D

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Part Of My Journal #3


THURSDAY 2 AUGUST 2012

What Is My Goal?

Hey. From the title of this journal, you can guess what I want to rant about today.

Yes. What Is My Goal?

Right now, my goal is to study hard and keep moving forward. You want to know what's wrong with that phrase. Easier said than done.

In life, you need to face a lot of challenges. One of those challenges are something that no one, and I mean NO ONE can avoid. Falling in love.

Okay, LOVE is a strong word. Um… A crush on someone?? Better?

Yeah, I know. Me? Have a crush on someone? Unbelievable. But, it's true. I do have a crush on someone. Now, here's where the title makes sense.

I came here to this university to study. Not to get caught in a romance situation. NO. I never asked for this feeling to come. But, it came anyway. No one can avoid this feeling.

But, at least you could try to ignore it for as long as you're going to be here in this university. How am I supposed to ignore this feeling if I'm going to see this guy every day in class, after class, when I hang out with my friends? He's going to be there.

Moreover, I can't ignore him on Facebook. I will chat with him whenever he's online (important stuff, okay. We chat about classes, assignments and stuff…). Sometimes, we would text each other too.

I don't know.

Ever since we started to get closer, everyone suspects something else. I don't want that. But, how can they not suspect something else? Whenever my friends and I are talking about him, they say that I would smile the whole time. And it's true.

From now on, I need to set my goal straight. I need to ignore this feeling at least a bit. Because, I don't want to stray away from my goal.

Oh God. Help me get rid of this feeling for a while. Please. I know that this is something natural to happen, but I want this to happen later on in life. I want to finish my studies and have a stable job first, at least.

I hope I can be strong for another two years here. Please don't make me regret ever coming here. L

So, I can't end this with my usual signature. But, All The Best and.. ..

Roger and Out. . .. . L

My Essay :)

Hey.

First of all, I want to apologise to all of you who have been waiting for my short story. Why???
Because, I won't be posting it within this week.

I am truly sorry... :( I have been busy this week and I just forgot about it.. I didn't even finish my short story yet... So, now, I'm using this time to at least make it up to you by posting one of my essay which I wrote for my exam last year...

Ah, the school days.. . . . . *doze off to the past..*

So, I hope you enjoy it and let me know if I should turn this little old essay into a book or something. Because I really feel like it.. :)

Here's the essay :


Kim was nervous when the door opened slowly to reveal the monsters that have taken over this world. Zombies. She immediately ran up the stairs to her room and locked the door behind her. She tried to calm down a little so that she could think of a way to get somewhere safer than her house. Her parents crossed her mind and she started to sob as she remembered how this day turned from a bright sunny day to a horrible night.
~ "Happy birthday!" Kim's parents exclaimed as she walked down the stairs with a tired face that morning. But her face immediately lit up when she saw that the whole living room was decorated with balloons and lots of other decorations.
She made a small shriek of happiness and ran to her parents with arms spread wide open for a hug. "Thank you so much mum and dad!" she exclaimed "I bet this is going to be the best birthday ever!" she continued. Her parents got out of her grip and led her to the middle of the living room.
Kim immediately ran towards the present her parents had bought her and opened them one by one. Her parents looked at her with a big grin on their face as they watched her open all her presents happily. "There is more than just presents for you, Kim," her mother said. Kim stopped her hunt for presents and looked at her mother.
"What else is there, mum?" she asked. Her mother looked at her dad and nodded. "What is it, mum?" Kim asked eagerly. Her mother gave her a warm smile.
"You're going to have a baby brother or sister," her mother announced. Kim's mouth went wide as she was shocked and happy at the same time.
"A baby brother or sister!" she said in disbelief "This is the best birthday, ever!" she exclaimed. ~
Her flashback ended. She sobbed uncontrollably after remembering all the events. She could still remember when they just got home from celebrating her birthday. Kim got inside her house first and waited for her parents to come along. But she was shocked when she heard her mother screamed. She ran to the door and saw an ugly man biting off her mother's neck.
What she saw before her eyes shocked her. Both of her parents were killed by the zombies. She walked backwards slowly away from the door. All of this led to where she was now, sobbing and scared for life. After a minute, she managed to calm down. She leaned her ear against her door to listen to what's going on downstairs. No sound.
She became curious and opened the door to take a peek. She gasped at what she saw. A zombie in front of her just looking at her. She froze in her place as she was too shocked to react. The zombie walked limply towards her while reaching out his hand to grab her.
As the zombie almost reached her, a hand grabbed the zombies head from behind and twisted it. The zombies head fell to the floor right beside its body. The blood of the zombie splashed all over Kim. When she looked at who was behind the zombie, she saw a guy equipped with fire power and swords. "We have to leave now," he said quickly and grabbed Kim by her forearm.
Kim pulled away from that guy in horror. "Who are you?" she asked. The guy looked at Kim in frustration. He grabbed Kim by her forearm again and pulled her with him.
"It doesn't matter. I saved your life and you're still alive. That's all that matters," he said quickly as they walked downstairs and out the front door towards a jeep. Kim took a glance towards her parents car and saw their body lying still in their place with a pool of blood. A tear slipped down her cheek.
She looked at the guy and saw that they were next to the jeep. The guy opened the door for her and she immediately went in. The guy went on the driver's side and starts the engine. They quickly drove away from Kim's house. " Where are you taking me?" Kim asked the stranger. The guy looked at her with a warm  smile.
"Somewhere safe," was all he said. Two words that made Kim relax a little. Two words that meant a lot. Kim and the mysterious guy drove away. Away from the neighbourhood, away from the city and towards somewhere much safer.
~~~~~~~
A/N : Well, that's it. Hope you like it, enjoy it and comment on it.
So, All The Best and. . . . .
Roger and Out. . . :D

Sunday, 29 July 2012

Three Words (4W1H)

Three Words (4W1H)


Who am I?
In this life;
Where I walk,
Without any guidance.

How can I?
Stand by you;
With my strength,
That is never enough.

When will I?
Spend my time;
Here with you,
While you are still around.

What can I?
Say to you;
Just so that,
You could understand me.

Why should I?
Leave you now;
Far from here,
When all I want is you.

~~~~~~~~~

A/N : This is just an experiment of mine on free verse poems... As you already know, they have absolutely NO rules. So, I just felt like writing one...

You should feel lucky because I haven't declared this poem as something I should show to people. Which means, this poem is very LIMITED. Something like that.

I just want your honest opinion on this poem and if you are an experienced poem writer, please critic this poem. I can take anything you're going to throw at me. Except for bombs. I'm not crazy enough to do such a thing... :P

*note at my sarcasm. :)

So, I guess that's it.

All The Best and...

Roger and Out... :D


Saturday, 28 July 2012

Part Of My Journal #2


THURSDAY 11 JULY 2012

Performance Night and Last Day of ‘Reinvention’

I know I said the birthday night is ‘The Best Night Ever’ but after tonight, this is the BEST night EVER!!!! Why??

Well, here comes another one of my stories. . . . :D

~~~~~

Ever since the beginning of the Reinvention Programme, all the Part 1 students were divided into 10 groups. 
Each group will have a few seniors to guide them.

My group consists of 11 member, six boys and five girls. We were assigned with five seniors – I hope I’m right -.

~~~~

What? They were the only ones who always show up. . Sheesh!
Oh, sorry. .  I’ll just get on with the story. . o_O

~~~~
Okay, so, for the Performance Night, my group was given the duty to perform Bollywood dance. The first thing that popped in my mind was 'Oh' *poker face*.. o_o

To tell you the truth, I don't mind dancing. Dancing is in my blood. I have realized this for a really long time but I never actually planned on enhancing this talent of mine. So, I see this as an opportunity to see how well can I dance.

And now, we go to the first day of practice. To put it simply, we did absolutely nothing. No progress at all. I think we already chosen a song on that day. Maybe.

Then, on the second or the third or the fourth day. Don't ask. I already forgot. I'm a horrible person!
Anyways, on -th day, we got some help from a lecturer to choreograph our dance. Okay, brace yourselves. . 
HE IS SO DAMN CUTE!!

Hehehe. ..  Didn't expect that to come from someone like me, did you? Did you? What? I'm just stating the fact. Any girl would say he's cute.

Oh, god. Where am I going with this? We're straying out of the topic.

Okay, okay. Back to the story.

On that day, we were able to finish half of the moves for our performance and I got to admit. I can dance. 

Everything just comes to me naturally. I was surprised by my own talents. Oh, god, why haven't I tried dancing before?

Anyways, after the practice, I practice the steps again - on my own -. So, the next day, I already memorized all the steps.

The lecturer didn't come on that day, though. So, we just practice the steps that we remember and try to perfect it.

The following days were just about the same so, there's not much to say.

Then, two or maybe three days before the performance - I am so sorry. I already forgot -, our lecturer came to teach us the rest of the steps. He made a few changes to our steps and choreographed the whole thing in just an hour or so.

I'm going to speed up the story from here… If that's okay with you? Okay?

The next day, we - the juniors and seniors - changed one part of the choreographed move. We changed it so that we could dance in pairs..

- The Day Of Rehearsal -

I thought that I wasn't going to be able to dance at all. Since, everyone there was going to see us dancing. I'll tell you this. Even though you can see me dancing, my whole body was actually trembling.

I was impressed with myself because I didn't get any steps wrong.. Hehehe…

- Performance Night -

We weren't as good as we practice, but it was so much fun… Oh, and I didn't tremble at all. In fact, I was having so much fun I messed up one step.. But, who cares? We did our best..

On that night, I realized that even though I LOVE writing, it doesn't mean I can't do anything else that doesn't involve writing.

Also, that night was the last time we could get together with everyone in this faculty.. Because after that, we're all going to be busy with our own problems..

But at least that didn't stop us from bumping with our seniors around the campus. If I could, I want to relive that night and stay there.

So, now you know why The Last Day Of Reinvention and Performance Night is the BEST night EVER!!

So yeah, that's it… All The Best and….

Roger and Out… :D